A story across three decades: an 18th-century play morphing into two 20th-century films and now a 21st-century jukebox musical. Sadly proof that pedigree does not always correlate to perfection.Summary
Rating
Good
Who started this creative triptych/quartet? Well, Pierre Choderlos de Laclos and his scandalous letter-based novel Les Liaisons Dangereuses in 1782. This in turn birthed a successful play in 1985 and then a campy box office hit in 1988 starring Glen Close, John Malkovich and Michelle Pfeiffer. In all iterations, an arch seducer (Malkovich) tries to seduce an innocent (Pfeiffer) in competition with his ex-lover/extreme frenemy (Close).
Roger Kumble saw all that period stuffiness and thought that it was ripe for some 90s revival. The Court of Versailles became a New York private school. Sarah Michelle Gellar, Ryan Phillippe, and Reese Witherspoon became the evil, worse, and virtuous trio with added almost-incest and burnt-tone lipstick. It’s as 90’s as a portable CD player and has aged almost as well.
Now 2015 comes around and Kumble along with Lindsey Rosin and Jordan Ross Schindler decide there is life in the old tale yet, let’s take it on the stage. What could possibly go wrong? Well, I’ll tell you.
Fans of the cult film will most likely still enjoy the affair as the dialogue is pretty much completely transplanted. The tweaks that soften the 90’s racism/homophobia are minimal but effective. Fleshing out both the gay storyline and the only black character, the music teacher, Joe Simmons and Luke Conner Hall have a real chance at a closet romance plot-line. Both sing their faces off trying to pull emotional wallop out of the added dialogue. Equally, Kevin Yates fills out the character of Ronald Clifford, who in the film is little more than a racist punchline, turning the tables on the privileged white cast, singing a cover of TLC’s ‘No Scrubs’. Other bangers include two No Doubt songs, some early Britney, Spice Girls and Natalie Imbruglia and the fact that these are now considered ‘vintage’ makes me want to throw myself off a bridge.
However, we move on. Impressive mock greco columns with the Manhattan skyline stretching away through the windows: Polly Sullivan’s set does conjure up the Upper East Side. Her costumes sadly do not, skewing as cheap and nothing like the Calvin Klein swaddled spoilt teenagers we most vividly remember. For a piece that has always been style over substance, this is a major issue.
Some gifted performances do pop up, especially Will Callan’s predatory slinkiness as the main seducer Sebastian. Yet the selection of the 90s hits is tangential, and at some points completely unconnected to the story. Jonathan O’Boyle’s direction has upped the campy comedy but in the process lost most of the sex appeal, reducing the tale to a very expensive karaoke session with quotes from the film in-between songs. Accents across the board are good but the eruption of well-known hits scupper any chance for character progression or much emotional empathy from us the audience. Finally, the tricky ending still proves to be as anticlimactic as its progenitor.
For almost 250 years this tale of sex, selfishness and scandal has titillated Western audiences and I think that is a pretty good run. But like the Qing or Russian Empires (both lasting a similar time) it has perhaps ground itself into the sand running creatively dry. This musical may be silly and sassy but it could never be called dangerous, scandalous or even particularly cruel.
Written by: Jordan Ross, Lindsey Rosin and Roger Kumble
Directed by: Jonathan O’Boyle
Produced by: Eva Price
Choreographer & Associate Director: Gary Lloyd
Set & Costume Design by: Polly Sullivan
Lighting Design by: Nick Richings
Sound Design by: Chris Whybrow
Musical Direction by: Will Joy
Cruel Intentions plays at New Wimbledon Theatre until Saturday 1 March, and on tour throughout the UK until 28 June.
