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Writers Daphna Attias and James Baldwin on Dante or Die’s Kiss Marry Kill
Anyone who’s come across work by Dante or Die will know that they always have an interesting story to tell and routinely find remarkable ways to tell their tale. You might remember the extraordinary Skin Hunger which addressed the theme of missing human touch during the enforced isolation of the pandemic, or the award winning interactive Odds On, which challenged issues of online gambling. Their latest project Kiss Marry Kill centres on a same-sex marriage in a UK prison, but between two men convicted of homophobic murders. This play promises to unlock many conversational avenues, so we were excited to get behind bars with Daphna Attias and James Baldwin who, along with Terry O’Donovan, wrote the play, to talk about it.
Hi there. Kiss Marry Kill looks really intriguing! Can you begin by telling us the premise of the show and how you came across the idea?
Daphna: The show is about two men who meet in a category A prison and decide to get married. They are both serving life sentences for homophobic murders.
It is performed in chapels and places where people get married, so there is a lot of story in the locations. The set is made out of recycled prison beds donated to us by Holloway prison. The cast of six brilliant performers includes people with lived experience of prison and one mighty rap artist called Lady Lykez, who also wrote the song lyrics.
Our show is a fictionalised version of a real story. It all started about five years ago when Terry came to me with an article about two prisoners who got married. We immediately knew there was a show in that, but didn’t know it would take us on such a long journey of exploration.
James: Terry approached me because I was making radio plays with offenders in prisons across the UK. As we talked, we realised how complex and difficult and dangerous it must have been to get married in such a volatile environment. I knew this was going to be an exciting story and was thrilled to be writing it with Terry and Daphna.
Dante or Die are renowned for their rigorous research processes in developing work. What’s been involved in writing this play?
Daphna: The play was a collaboration between three writers, myself, DOD’s co-artistic director Terry O’Donovan and James Baldwin. Since we first read that article, we’ve embarked on a five year journey that included visiting a variety of LGBTQ+ groups, five different prisons, we have met with forensic psychologists, prison sexual health workers, chaplains, governors and officers, academics leading research in the field of LGBTQ+ in prisons.
We asked about equality, human rights, redemption, love, touch and sex in prison. Every meeting opened up more questions and challenged our beliefs further. Nothing in this story was black and white.
James: Writing as a three has helped us reflect on our own experiences and understanding of homophobia, violence and masculinity. Drawing on our own lives has helped us consider how the audience might receive the work and its knotty, frightening, hopeful themes.
Kiss Marry Kill sounds like a powerful production, dealing with graphic violence and difficult, intimate subjects. Will it be heavy going?
Daphna: There are violent moments and scenes of a sexual nature but there is also a lot of poetry and, the way the show is written, some lighter/funnier moments and romantic scenes. There is a lot of music and rapping used to tell the story as well. So yes, the play askes the audience to ask some complex questions but the experience of watching it goes through a range of emotions.
James: We’ve leant into theatricality to tell the story and the form has influenced the writing and structure of the script. The poetic moments help to explode us from reality – we want the audience to go on a journey and be surprised by the twist and turns – not only in the story content but in the story telling too.
Who is in the cast, and what do they each bring to the stage?
Daphna: We have a brilliant cast of six talented performers. Jay and Paul are played by Dauda Ledejobi and Graham Mackay-Bruce. All the other characters are played by an ensemble of people with lived experience of the criminal justice system. We met Morgan Archer, Frank Skully and Dean Statham through the work we did with Synergy Theatre who have been the most brilliant partners for this production. And in partnership with them ran two training programmes for people with prison experience.
And finally, rap artist Lady Lykez who plays a variety of roles but also wrote the song lyrics for the show.
James: Whenever I’m in rehearsals I’m always struck at how friendly, fun, and generous the cast and company are. Everyone is very supportive of each other and there is openness. In the rehearsal room, there’s a real mix of life experiences, backgrounds and sexual identities that are relevant to this story, so it makes everyone curious and connected to these characters and their lives.
Can you talk a bit about the musical elements of the production?
Daphna: From the beginning of the creation we knew music and spoken word would be a significant element of the story telling. We have worked with musician Yaniv Fridel for many years and back in the first R&D in 2019 he suggested we contacted Lady Lykez who he had worked with before. So together they have created a really impactful score. Sometimes the music feels like a rave, sometimes like a church. All punctuated by Lykez’s strong lyrics.
James: Lykez is the most generous collaborator. Writing alongside her, with our different disciplines, to tell this story has been a riot.
How do you think the show might impact its audiences, and is there anything you hope they might take away from the production?
Daphna: I would like the audience to ask questions about love and redemption, about who deserves to be loved. About the prison system and what it is there to do. About touch and sexuality and human rights. Questions about homophobia and how casual it is that we don’t even notice it when it creeps up in everyday language. I would like audiences to be as challenged and confused as we were during the research for this show and reminded that ethical questions are complex.
James: There’s a lot of ourselves invested in this story. We’ve tried to look after each other, ourselves and our audience in how we’ve told this story, which is arresting and frightening but we hope also hopeful. People are remarkable, especially in remarkable circumstances. I hope the audience wonder what could or should happen next in our characters’ lives. I hope they wonder whether a story like this could or should happen again in reality.
Thanks very much to Daphna and James for taking the time to tell us about this fascinating show. Kiss Marry Kill runs from Wednesday 20 March to Sunday 19 May. Look out for it at a venue near you. Full details available here.
ET will be seeing the show at Stone Nest in London Tuesday 16 to Tuesday 26 April, so watch this space for our review!
